If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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