guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize