I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
