:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Your penis caused this!
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
