Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
the liver wants what the liver wants
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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