ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
