it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Randomize
