i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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