The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
