i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
