we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
