Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
