it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
