just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
