I'm so fucking centered right now
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize