therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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