Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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