Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
