google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
