So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
