omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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