how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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