apparently the secret to your success is patron
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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