dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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