well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
