i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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