i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
How drunk are you?
Completed.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
