i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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