I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
