Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize