There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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