were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Your shirt... Was in my pants
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
