ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
