everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
