ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
