my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
