There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You need Xanax blowdarts
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize