thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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