There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Damn victory sex feels great
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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