Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
