I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Nicole vs. Life
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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