Dual....:-)
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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