Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
We are two peas in an std pod
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
