This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
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