Non-Jews are for practice
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
