belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize