the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
