I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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