I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Nicole vs. Life
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Of course I have a pirate flag
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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