pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
